Thanks for taking the time to respond, Jay. I know we both desperately
want the best for our kids and from our cultural experiences each see
the path a little differently. One more shot from the soap box and
I’ll get off.

I am under no illusion that my child hasn't or doesn't drink alcohol.
I did my experimentation when I was younger too. My goal was not to
have her never drink. My goal was to give her that choice. The
overwhelming consensus seems to be that kids will, so tell them to go
ahead but be responsible - a stamp of approval on succumbing to peer
pressure. If my daughter makes the choice to drink, that's her
business. If she did it just because everyone else was doing it, that
would not be a healthy reason. I've shown her, not just told her, that
saying no is a choice she CAN make. She has learned that peer approval
is a fleeting vapor that pales in comparison to the self respect one
has for making ones own choices. Of course a side benefit is that she
takes responsibility for her actions. If she chooses to drink, she
knows she alone made the choice and will do it responsibly. Never does
she put blame for her actions on anyone else.

We pilots are in the same situation. We pilots, like we non-drinkers,
have chosen to pursue a path that few others are following. Some envy
us because we are doing something they don't have the guts or
discipline to do, but most others look at us as odd and obsessed.
Their lack of approval means nothing to me. I have the self respect
that comes with making my own choices. I raised my daughter with that
same attitude. She knew what she wanted to do with her life the day
she left high school. At 25 she has a wonderful husband, has put
herself through college, is established in a great career, owns a
home, and makes me proud every day. My not drinking may not have
affected her fate, but I feel that it, along with my flying did
reinforce in her the confidence that she could do anything she wanted
and not do anything she didn't. Those who want to convince me that I
raised her wrong are just too late. YMMV. Other methods may work too.
Life's lessons can be learned in a variety of ways and many kids are
still living at home at 25.
--
Gene Seibel
Hangar 131 - http://pad39a.com/gene/plane.html
Because I fly, I envy no one.



"Jay Honeck" wrote in message news:fsPyb.384007$Tr4.1121745@attbi_s03...
And I can't see anything bad in that. I'm curious why people do
drink......

Nothing wrong with not drinking alcohol, Gene -- I often go days and weeks
without myself.

However, the health benefits of drinking in moderation are hard to dispute.
A glass or two of beer or wine at the end of a long, stressful day can only
be described as "just what the doctor ordered" -- both mentally AND
physically.

You are right, however, that drinking is like a lottery -- you never know
who is going to be susceptible to the "Dark Side" of alcohol. It's a
wonder that my oldest sister and I can drink in moderation, without ill
effect -- in fact, with enhanced *healthful* effect -- while my youngest
sister has spent three decades in the depths of alcoholism and drug abuse.

But I *do* worry about my children, not knowing whether they have the "evil
gene" of alcoholism. Not knowing if they will be able to drink socially and
safely is a deep concern, given my family history -- but I don't think our
not drinking will effect their fate one way or the other.

When they go to high school and (more prevalently )college, alcohol will be
everywhere, and they WILL partake, guaranteed. I think it may be the
"anti-alcohol" movement on campus that has romanticized drinking for the
kids, and made "binge drinking" into an Olympic sport on campuses
nationwide.

Given this certainty, drinking RESPONSIBLY is something I want them to see,
and emulate.