somebody didnt catch the joke

"Ditch" wrote in message
...
(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

I just use a backpack...it fits nicely between the seats in the Caravan.

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

Things to hold the aftermath of bodily
functions...see---http://forums.flightinfo.com/showthread.php?t=44435

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

One that doesn't use up all your battery power by just sitting there (like
mine
do).

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?


The one where the microphone doesn't work.

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

RayBan Aviators...or those General Macarther ones they used to have.

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

An F-104

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?



No...

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.


Wuss...Be a man and see what you are going to hit.





-John
*You are nothing until you have flown a Douglas, Lockheed, Grumman or
North
American*