I wasn't planning to announce the new MKII Glider Egress System until the few remaining technical problems are resolved.

Our system provides vertical assistance for rapid egress, ground or in-flight. We call it the Omni-Upward Cockpit Hoister, or OUCH for short. Using a reliable cluster of four 12 gauge shotgun blanks, We have egressed sand bags with only very minor burn damage and leakage. However, we are experiencing difficulty locating persons willing to test the system. This, in spite of a rather generous two-figure post-launch bonus. Well, we did have one volunteer, an altogether suboptimal tester if you ask me, as he refused to stop screaming and calmly explain what he did wrong to cause his injuries.

A previous idea of using a small compressed air or CO2, with a 90 degree ball valve to inflate a rubberized nylon (or similar) lift bag under the cockpit cushion, was rejected as being either too reliable or boring.