As heard on 123.3........

From the Senior Championship, SLGP.
Call signs will be omitted.

" Glider XYZ, you will climb better if you raise your gear."

Answer:

"I'm urinating." (thick foreign accent, apparently his pee tube only worked with the gear down.)

Walt Connelly

"ZYX, do you think I am an a**hole?'

"Yes, ABC, you are an a**hole."

(1/2 hour later)

"ZYX, do you really think I am an a**hole?'

"Yes, ABC, you are."

(1/2 hour later)

"ZYX, do you still think I am an a**hole?'

(exasperated) "No, ABC. You are a wonderful guy!"

"Gee thanks, ZYX. You know your gear is down?"

At 13:45 09 October 2020, wrote:
"ZYX, do you think I am an a**hole?'

"Yes, ABC, you are an a**hole."

(1/2 hour later)

"ZYX, do you really think I am an a**hole?'

"Yes, ABC, you are."

(1/2 hour later)

"ZYX, do you still think I am an a**hole?'

(exasperated) "No, ABC. You are a wonderful guy!"

"Gee thanks, ZYX. You know your gear is down?"

Ona competition in UK glider called
581 yours wheel is down
No reply
581 your wheel is down
Still no reply
Angry call 581 YOUR WHEEL IS DOWN.
Finally reply Yes it’s down locked welded and fixed!
Aircraft was Club Libelle

The details are hazy but IIRC, at the practice day for an uncomfortably warm and humid midwestern regional contest in the 60s involving a national champion pilot and his attractive wife:

Wife: "___, are you going to be landing soon? I'm hot and I want to go back to the motel."

Chorus of male voices cheering, hooting, and whistling, with one pilot enthusiastically offering to land and accompany her if hubbie wanted to keep flying.

Chip Bearden
JB

On Sunday, October 4, 2020 at 4:17:51 PM UTC-4, John Sinclair wrote:
Honey, the trailer CAME OFF!
WHAT! WHERE?
Just outside of town!
Is the trailer all right?
Yes
(Pause)
Is the car all right?
Yes
(Long pause)
Are you all right?
Yes........ (longer pause).......Thanks for asking!
😳JJ

Not on 123.3.....but good anyway.....
Regional contest, late day, pilots and crew hanging out, BS'ing, having a beer...
GF/crew shows up, looks at pilot BF....
The rabbit died!
Total silence of the group....
Find out, their crew car was a VW Rabbit (golf in other markets)...."rabbit died" meant something different in the US decades ago...;-)

Second hand:

XYZ, on final, your gear is up.
XYZ: What?
XYZ, your landing gear is up!
(goes on a while. Finally)
XYZ: I can't hear you guys. There is some darn buzzer going off in here.

First hand. Littlefield TX standard class nationals -- one of the first with D2 like gliders that load really heavy and the nose points up a lot. Towpilots fly in from around the state, many used to towing 2-33's all day long.

Pilot: Towplane x, 5 more knots.
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 70 KNOTS NOW!


Next tow:
Pilot: TOWPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
PIlot: TOWPLANE X 5 MORE KNOTS NOW!

This keeps going on for several tows until finally

Towplane x: What do y'all wanna fly so fast for anyhow?

John Cochrane

At 19:02 13 October 2020, John Cochrane wrote:
Second hand:

XYZ, on final, your gear is up.
XYZ: What?
XYZ, your landing gear is up!
(goes on a while. Finally)
XYZ: I can't hear you guys. There is some darn buzzer going off in
here.

First hand. Littlefield TX standard class nationals -- one of the first
with D2 like gliders that load really heavy and the nose points up a lot.
Towpilots fly in from around the state, many used to towing 2-33's all
day
long.

Pilot: Towplane x, 5 more knots.
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 70 KNOTS NOW!


Next tow:
Pilot: TOWPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
PIlot: TOWPLANE X 5 MORE KNOTS NOW!

This keeps going on for several tows until finally

Towplane x: What do y'all wanna fly so fast for anyhow?

John Cochrane


Minden, late 1970's, the pilot and his crew/girlfriend talked to each other

on the radio like it was a telephone: "Honey, I'm off tow and you can go
to town for groceries now." "OK darling, I have to stop at the gas station

first though." "That's OK but remember to get the kind of chips I like
when you are at the store." This kind of thing happened often when this
lovely couple showed up at Minden. During one of these episodes, a
friend was helping me get strapped in my glider and I had the radio on.
My friend says "Oh, I see that Mic Chatter and his girlfriend Frequency
Hog are here again!" True story!

On Monday, October 19, 2020 at 2:00:07 AM UTC-7, James Hamilton wrote:
At 19:02 13 October 2020, John Cochrane wrote:
Second hand:

XYZ, on final, your gear is up.
XYZ: What?
XYZ, your landing gear is up!
(goes on a while. Finally)
XYZ: I can't hear you guys. There is some darn buzzer going off in
here.

First hand. Littlefield TX standard class nationals -- one of the first
with D2 like gliders that load really heavy and the nose points up a lot..
Towpilots fly in from around the state, many used to towing 2-33's all
day
long.

Pilot: Towplane x, 5 more knots.
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 70 KNOTS NOW!


Next tow:
Pilot: TOWPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
PIlot: TOWPLANE X 5 MORE KNOTS NOW!

This keeps going on for several tows until finally

Towplane x: What do y'all wanna fly so fast for anyhow?

John Cochrane
Minden, late 1970's, the pilot and his crew/girlfriend talked to each other

on the radio like it was a telephone: "Honey, I'm off tow and you can go
to town for groceries now." "OK darling, I have to stop at the gas station

first though." "That's OK but remember to get the kind of chips I like
when you are at the store." This kind of thing happened often when this
lovely couple showed up at Minden. During one of these episodes, a
friend was helping me get strapped in my glider and I had the radio on.
My friend says "Oh, I see that Mic Chatter and his girlfriend Frequency
Hog are here again!" True story!

I believe that same pilot called his crew and told her to wash the trailer! After a short pause, several other pilots called their crews with the sane request. Most responses were on the lines of “Let me get right on that�, but my crew simply said, “Cram it�!
JJ

On Monday, October 19, 2020 at 3:00:07 AM UTC-6, James Hamilton wrote:
At 19:02 13 October 2020, John Cochrane wrote:
Second hand:

XYZ, on final, your gear is up.
XYZ: What?
XYZ, your landing gear is up!
(goes on a while. Finally)
XYZ: I can't hear you guys. There is some darn buzzer going off in
here.

First hand. Littlefield TX standard class nationals -- one of the first
with D2 like gliders that load really heavy and the nose points up a lot.
Towpilots fly in from around the state, many used to towing 2-33's all
day
long.

Pilot: Towplane x, 5 more knots.
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
(noise)
Pilot: TOWOPLANE X, 70 KNOTS NOW!


Next tow:
Pilot: TOWPLANE X, 5 MORE KNOTS!
PIlot: TOWPLANE X 5 MORE KNOTS NOW!

This keeps going on for several tows until finally

Towplane x: What do y'all wanna fly so fast for anyhow?

John Cochrane


Minden, late 1970's, the pilot and his crew/girlfriend talked to each other

on the radio like it was a telephone: "Honey, I'm off tow and you can go
to town for groceries now." "OK darling, I have to stop at the gas station

first though." "That's OK but remember to get the kind of chips I like
when you are at the store." This kind of thing happened often when this
lovely couple showed up at Minden. During one of these episodes, a
friend was helping me get strapped in my glider and I had the radio on.
My friend says "Oh, I see that Mic Chatter and his girlfriend Frequency
Hog are here again!" True story!


There were a pair in the UK that used the handles "Cockle" and "Cockle Shell"

At 18:45 19 October 2020, Frank Whiteley wrote:
There were a pair in the UK that used the handles "Cockle" and
"Cockle Shell"

It gets worse. I knew of "Fox" and "Foxhole" (a married couple).
But then, on the bright side, also "Rhubarb" and "Custard"!
J.