What are the odds?

It was a clear calm morning. The sun was just coming up over the ocean. The
temperature was around 70F. I had an easy commute in to work. The employee
parking shuttle bus driver waited for me to walk over and board instead of
making me wait 15 minutes for the next one. I had only one Jeppeson update
to do. There weren't any nasty memoes from the chief pilot. No one was
running their noisy APU, so I did the pre-flight exterior inspection. For
once, I didn't find any discrepencies. The only way it could have been
better is if I started the day fishing instead of waiting until I got off
work to go fishing.

After the pre-flight, I was standing next to the plane chatting with a
friend. He and I used to tow banners together. As we were talking, a big
cloud of smoke rolled across the airfield. It was tire smoke but too much
for a normal landing. Then a gate agent motioned for me to come up the
jetway because the boarding passengers were concerned about the smell. I
gave them an explanation that worked. After I hung up the PA, my
helper-pilot told me that the main runway was shut down because of a
disabled aircraft. We made a bet on which airline it was. It turned out to
be my turn to buy lunch.

Our departure time is at the start of the morning rush of departures, but
the morning rush wasn't happening because many flights were having headaches
trying to get their weight down so they could use the short runway. We
launched from the short runway in good time.

The trip up to the Northeast was pleasant. We called the field insight from
60 miles out. Our turn time was good. We were ready to board when my
intuition made the other pilot call clearance. Sure enough, we had a 2 hour
gate hold because of delays due to a disabled airplane at our destination.
That was going to cut into my fishing time.

After the first hour passed, and the greasy spoon diner they call a
restaurant had started serving lunch, I sauntered up to the gate area to get
a bite to eat. I was surrounded by anxious passengers wanting more
information. The gate agent had been instructed not to say anything. A
certain irritable streak deep inside was starting to wiggle around because,
unlike management, I know how to run an airline. I picked up the PA and gave
the folks the information they craved. Just as my speech was winding down,
the gate agent wispered to me that our gear-up time had been moved up. I
keyed the PA again and told everyone that we had 20 minutes to be in the air
or else ATC would send us to the end of the list.

Those people must have liked my speech. They ran down the jetway. They
stuffed bags in the overheads with super-human strength. I think I saw them
shove the last standing passenger into a seat. We set a record for boarding
a full plane. They must have liked my speech. Number 2 engine was lit and
spooling up as we ran the runway. We made it into the air with less than a
minute left of our edict. Maybe I should use that speech more often.

The flight southbound was just as nice. ATC was giving vectors and speed
restrictions to other traffic in order to get the required in-trail spacing,
but they left us alone. All was going well. Too well. On the arrival, 30
miles from the airport, we were given holding instructions. It caught us by
surprise. I had to fly the first orbit by hand until my helper-pilot
programmed the hold into the FMS. Then he called the tower for more
information. He turned to me and said, "What are the odds?".

The main runway was still shutdown because it still had an airplane on it
with 8 blown tires. The second runway was now shutdown because it also had
an airplane on it with blown tires. What are the odds?

The second plane was a DC-3. I know that the last DC-3 towbar left the
airport a long time ago. The first disabled plane was still on it's axles.
The airport wouldn't be open anytime soon. We decided that holding wouldn't
change anything, so we diverted to another airport.

I never did get to go fishing that day. It was a beautiful day for fishing
and I was stuck at the airport. What are the odds?

D.

"Capt.Doug" wrote in message
...
It was a clear calm morning. The sun was just coming up over the ocean.
The
temperature was around 70F.

Snip (good story)

I never did get to go fishing that day. It was a beautiful day for fishing
and I was stuck at the airport. What are the odds?

D.
_________________________________

Goes to show; Murphy is alive and well!
--
Jim in NC



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"Morgans" wrote in message Snip (good story)

The first plane was a Fed-Ex A-300 out of Newark. They stopped in less than
4000' of runway. All 8 main tires were blown. Jacks had to be trucked in to
raise it up to change the tires. Once it was raised, the brakes wouldn't
disassemble. It was on the runway about 12 hours. Interestingly, it isn't in
the FAA's incident listings.

The second plane was a DC-3 based at nearby airport. Flat tires on
taildraggers can be tricky. Fortunately they didn't ground-loop it.

The local newspaper reported that no flights had to divert. You know I sent
a sarcastic e-mail to that editor.

D.

"Capt.Doug" wrote:

The local newspaper reported that no flights had to divert. You know I sent
a sarcastic e-mail to that editor.

It may have been simply a case of the layman editor not understanding the jargon
(what are the odds? :-)
I believe that the layman thinks "divert" means "abort landing".

Russell Kent

"Capt.Doug" wrote in message ...
"Morgans" wrote in message Snip (good story)

The first plane was a Fed-Ex A-300 out of Newark. They stopped in less than
4000' of runway. All 8 main tires were blown. Jacks had to be trucked in to
raise it up to change the tires. Once it was raised, the brakes wouldn't
disassemble. It was on the runway about 12 hours. Interestingly, it isn't in
the FAA's incident listings.

The second plane was a DC-3 based at nearby airport. Flat tires on
taildraggers can be tricky. Fortunately they didn't ground-loop it.

The local newspaper reported that no flights had to divert. You know I sent
a sarcastic e-mail to that editor.

D.

This is what happens when a rookie presses the "MAX" autobrake button
on approach to a dry runway. This is a no-no. Do not pass "GO", do
not collect $200.00 Earn-as-you-learn maintenance can produce this
result also. Don't ask how I know.

pacplyer