A aviation & planes forum. AviationBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » AviationBanter forum » rec.aviation newsgroups » Products
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Joke



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old May 30th 07, 08:07 AM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 975
Default Joke

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
oups.com...
On May 23, 3:21 am, "Mr Pounder"

wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
ooglegroups.com...

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Phil Kyle" wrote in
message
...
Peter Hucker wrote in
news
Management exam (I got 0 out of 4!)

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions
and
will
tell
you
whether you are qualified to be a professional
manager.
Scroll
down
for each answer. The questions are NOT difficult.
But
don't
scroll
down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator,
put
in
the
giraffe,
and
close the door. This question tests whether you
tend
to
do
simple
things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a
refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the
elephant,
and
close
the
refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out
the
giraffe,
put
in
the elephant and close the door. This tests your
ability
to
think
through the repercussions of your previous
actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference.
All
the
animals
attend... except one. Which animal does not
attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in
the
refrigerator.
You
just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay,
even
if
you
did
not answer the first three questions correctly,
you
still
have
one
more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used
by
crocodiles,
and
you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim
across.
Have
you
not
been paying attention? All the crocodiles are
attending
the
Animal
Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly
from
your
mistakes.

Cue Zach claiming he heard this 2 months ago at
work
and
that
he
does
have friends, honest, he's not a fat loser, no!
--

This was originaly my bloody joke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about spelling - spell check is in French & I
can't
seem
to
change
it.

Mr Pounder

French? Yup, you definitely need a spill chucker.

Spill Chucker is MS latest **** up.

You miss spelt MS.

I think not.

Yes, we've noticed.

"We" indeed. I am too long in the tooth to fall for that one.

You still walked right into it.

I think not.

Thanks for reminding us again but we already know.

Bait taken, as always you take my bait.

No, you've taken mine. Again.

Cute, nice try :-)

I know. You should try it sometime.

When is the last time that somebody told you that you are
boring?

Boring? Moi?

Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.

Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.


Yes.


No.


Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.


No.


Yes.


No!

  #12  
Old June 5th 07, 07:09 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Peter Hucker[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 539
Default Joke

On Mon, 28 May 2007 04:08:27 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?


You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.


Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?


Actually I used it first.

Google is your friend, use it.


I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)


You mean you can't make up your own replies?

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
  #13  
Old June 5th 07, 07:10 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Peter Hucker[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 539
Default Joke

On Wed, 30 May 2007 08:07:39 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.


No.


Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.


Yes.


No!


No ARGHHHHH marks in demon.local.

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
  #14  
Old June 7th 07, 02:14 AM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 975
Default Joke

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Wed, 30 May 2007 08:07:39 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.

No.


Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.

Yes.


No!


No ARGHHHHH marks in demon.local.


Shall I mark your words?

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.


That was truly lame.

  #15  
Old June 7th 07, 02:15 AM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 975
Default Joke

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 28 May 2007 04:08:27 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.


Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?


Actually I used it first.


Since when, P.Hucker?

Google is your friend, use it.


I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)


You mean you can't make up your own replies?


Must you parrot everything I say?

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.


Or, in your case, P.Hucker, all of them.

  #16  
Old June 7th 07, 08:28 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Mr Pounder[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 80
Default Joke


"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
oups.com...
On May 23, 3:21 am, "Mr Pounder"

wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote
in
ooglegroups.com...

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Phil Kyle" wrote in
message
...
Peter Hucker wrote in
news
Management exam (I got 0 out of 4!)

The following short quiz consists of 4
questions
and
will
tell
you
whether you are qualified to be a professional
manager.
Scroll
down
for each answer. The questions are NOT
difficult.
But
don't
scroll
down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a
refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator,
put
in
the
giraffe,
and
close the door. This question tests whether
you
tend
to
do
simple
things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a
refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the
elephant,
and
close
the
refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take
out
the
giraffe,
put
in
the elephant and close the door. This tests
your
ability
to
think
through the repercussions of your previous
actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal
conference.
All
the
animals
attend... except one. Which animal does not
attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is
in
the
refrigerator.
You
just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay,
even
if
you
did
not answer the first three questions
correctly,
you
still
have
one
more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is
used
by
crocodiles,
and
you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and
swim
across.
Have
you
not
been paying attention? All the crocodiles are
attending
the
Animal
Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly
from
your
mistakes.

Cue Zach claiming he heard this 2 months ago at
work
and
that
he
does
have friends, honest, he's not a fat loser, no!
--

This was originaly my bloody joke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about spelling - spell check is in French &
I
can't
seem
to
change
it.

Mr Pounder

French? Yup, you definitely need a spill chucker.

Spill Chucker is MS latest **** up.

You miss spelt MS.

I think not.

Yes, we've noticed.

"We" indeed. I am too long in the tooth to fall for that
one.

You still walked right into it.

I think not.

Thanks for reminding us again but we already know.

Bait taken, as always you take my bait.

No, you've taken mine. Again.

Cute, nice try :-)

I know. You should try it sometime.

When is the last time that somebody told you that you are
boring?

Boring? Moi?

Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.

Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.


No.


Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.


Yes.


No!


Yeah, it is the only friend that you have.
Bruce ffs.

Mr Pounder


  #17  
Old June 7th 07, 08:38 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Mr Pounder[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 80
Default Joke


"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.ttgnd8j24buhsv@fx62...
On Mon, 28 May 2007 04:08:27 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce
wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.


Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?


Actually I used it first.

Google is your friend, use it.


I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)


You mean you can't make up your own replies?


Peter, Bruce is my blood letting.

Mr Pounder


--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs
the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com
http://www.petersphotos.com

Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.



  #18  
Old June 8th 07, 01:32 AM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 975
Default Joke

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
oups.com...
On May 23, 3:21 am, "Mr Pounder"

wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote
in
ooglegroups.com...

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Phil Kyle" wrote in
message
...
Peter Hucker wrote in
news
Management exam (I got 0 out of 4!)

The following short quiz consists of 4
questions
and
will
tell
you
whether you are qualified to be a professional
manager.
Scroll
down
for each answer. The questions are NOT
difficult.
But
don't
scroll
down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a
refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator,
put
in
the
giraffe,
and
close the door. This question tests whether
you
tend
to
do
simple
things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a
refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the
elephant,
and
close
the
refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take
out
the
giraffe,
put
in
the elephant and close the door. This tests
your
ability
to
think
through the repercussions of your previous
actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal
conference.
All
the
animals
attend... except one. Which animal does not
attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is
in
the
refrigerator.
You
just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay,
even
if
you
did
not answer the first three questions
correctly,
you
still
have
one
more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is
used
by
crocodiles,
and
you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and
swim
across.
Have
you
not
been paying attention? All the crocodiles are
attending
the
Animal
Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly
from
your
mistakes.

Cue Zach claiming he heard this 2 months ago at
work
and
that
he
does
have friends, honest, he's not a fat loser, no!
--

This was originaly my bloody joke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about spelling - spell check is in French &
I
can't
seem
to
change
it.

Mr Pounder

French? Yup, you definitely need a spill chucker.

Spill Chucker is MS latest **** up.

You miss spelt MS.

I think not.

Yes, we've noticed.

"We" indeed. I am too long in the tooth to fall for that
one.

You still walked right into it.

I think not.

Thanks for reminding us again but we already know.

Bait taken, as always you take my bait.

No, you've taken mine. Again.

Cute, nice try :-)

I know. You should try it sometime.

When is the last time that somebody told you that you are
boring?

Boring? Moi?

Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.

Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.

No.


Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.

Yes.


No!


Yeah, it is the only friend that you have.
Bruce ffs.


What does someone as friendless as you know about friends?

  #19  
Old June 8th 07, 03:32 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Mr Pounder[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 80
Default Joke


"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote
in
message
oups.com...
On May 23, 3:21 am, "Mr Pounder"

wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote
in
ooglegroups.com...

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Phil Kyle" wrote
in
message
...
Peter Hucker wrote in
news
Management exam (I got 0 out of 4!)

The following short quiz consists of 4
questions
and
will
tell
you
whether you are qualified to be a
professional
manager.
Scroll
down
for each answer. The questions are NOT
difficult.
But
don't
scroll
down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a
refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the
refrigerator,
put
in
the
giraffe,
and
close the door. This question tests whether
you
tend
to
do
simple
things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a
refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in
the
elephant,
and
close
the
refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take
out
the
giraffe,
put
in
the elephant and close the door. This tests
your
ability
to
think
through the repercussions of your previous
actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal
conference.
All
the
animals
attend... except one. Which animal does not
attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant
is
in
the
refrigerator.
You
just put him in there. This tests your
memory.
Okay,
even
if
you
did
not answer the first three questions
correctly,
you
still
have
one
more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it
is
used
by
crocodiles,
and
you do not have a boat. How do you manage
it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and
swim
across.
Have
you
not
been paying attention? All the crocodiles
are
attending
the
Animal
Meeting. This tests whether you learn
quickly
from
your
mistakes.

Cue Zach claiming he heard this 2 months ago
at
work
and
that
he
does
have friends, honest, he's not a fat loser,
no!
--

This was originaly my bloody
joke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about spelling - spell check is in
French &
I
can't
seem
to
change
it.

Mr Pounder

French? Yup, you definitely need a spill
chucker.

Spill Chucker is MS latest **** up.

You miss spelt MS.

I think not.

Yes, we've noticed.

"We" indeed. I am too long in the tooth to fall for
that
one.

You still walked right into it.

I think not.

Thanks for reminding us again but we already know.

Bait taken, as always you take my bait.

No, you've taken mine. Again.

Cute, nice try :-)

I know. You should try it sometime.

When is the last time that somebody told you that you
are
boring?

Boring? Moi?

Wee.

In your pants?

ffs

So, in actual fach, you can't pound her, eh?

You have been here too long ------ "pound her" is ancient.

Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.

No.

Yes?


No.

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.

Yes.

No!


Yeah, it is the only friend that you have.
Bruce ffs.


What does someone as friendless as you know about friends?


I chose my friends, they do not chose me.

Mr Pounder





  #20  
Old June 8th 07, 09:42 PM posted to alt.talk.bollocks,demon.local,ne.weather,comp.os.os2.advocacy,rec.aviation.products
Mr Pounder[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 80
Default Joke


"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Wed, 30 May 2007 08:07:39 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce
wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Yes, it was one of mine. Last year. Remember?

No.

Yes.

No.

Yes?

Google is your friend, use it.

I'm using it right now. (Not that's you'd ever notice.)

Yes.

No.

Yes.

No!


No ARGHHHHH marks in demon.local.


Shall I mark your words?


Why start now?

Mr Pounder

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs
the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com
http://www.petersphotos.com

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.


That was truly lame.



 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
A REALLY bad joke Danny Dot Piloting 42 November 28th 06 09:46 PM
Joke Phil Rhodes Naval Aviation 0 November 13th 06 09:06 PM
joke of the day TwisterR Simulators 0 March 30th 06 09:30 PM
flying joke Capt. Wild Bill Kelso, USAAC General Aviation 0 July 22nd 05 06:54 AM
Max 3 years to $3M :: No Joke! Kevin Home Built 0 March 6th 05 09:57 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 12:34 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 AviationBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.