A aviation & planes forum. AviationBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » AviationBanter forum » rec.aviation newsgroups » Products
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old September 15th 07, 03:34 PM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Peter Hucker[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 539
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)

Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti

Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%

Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.


--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?
Ads
  #2  
Old September 16th 07, 12:22 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)

Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti

Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%

Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.


Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!

  #3  
Old September 16th 07, 08:57 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Naked Gonad
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 119
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

On Sep 16, 12:22 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:


Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)


Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti


Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%


Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.

Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


This prevents the buildup of plaque in your anus.
Trust me! I am a Dentist.

Gonad

  #4  
Old September 16th 07, 09:08 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Naked Gonad wrote:
On Sep 16, 12:22 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:


Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)


Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti


Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%


Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.
Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


This prevents the buildup of plaque in your anus.
Trust me! I am a Dentist.


A dentist, eh? Sounds like you know a lot about cavities.

  #5  
Old September 16th 07, 10:13 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Naked Gonad
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 119
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

On Sep 16, 9:08 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Naked Gonad wrote:
On Sep 16, 12:22 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:


Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)


Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti


Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%


Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.


2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.
Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


This prevents the buildup of plaque in your anus.
Trust me! I am a Dentist.


A dentist, eh? Sounds like you know a lot about cavities.


On the hole, yes.

  #6  
Old September 16th 07, 12:55 PM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Naked Gonad wrote:
On Sep 16, 9:08 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Naked Gonad wrote:
On Sep 16, 12:22 am, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:


Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)


Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti


Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%


Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%


Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.


2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%


A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.
Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


This prevents the buildup of plaque in your anus.
Trust me! I am a Dentist.


A dentist, eh? Sounds like you know a lot about cavities.


On the hole, yes.


What about arseholes?

  #7  
Old September 16th 07, 05:46 PM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Peter Hucker[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 539
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 00:22:09 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)

Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti

Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%

Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%

Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.


All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.


A vibrant life on usenet, yes ok......

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%

A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.


Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


Conservation of angular momentum.

--
This message has been brought to you by solar and wind power. Who needs the national grid?
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com

When they found out their wives were attending a sex-toy party,
the husbands refused to go and pick them up,
and instead left them to their own devices.
  #8  
Old September 17th 07, 08:37 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 00:22:09 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)

Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti

Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%

Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%

Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.

All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.


Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.


A vibrant life on usenet, yes ok......


And elsewhere. At least I don't have parrots squawking about the place
at all hours.

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%

A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.


Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?


Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!


Conservation of angular momentum.


On what basis do you make that k'lame?

When they found out their wives were attending a sex-toy party,
the husbands refused to go and pick them up,
and instead left them to their own devices.


That was lame.

  #9  
Old September 18th 07, 03:31 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 17 Sep 2007 08:37:15 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 00:22:09 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sat, 15 Sep 2007 00:39:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Usenet Stats Poster wrote:
NGStatistics: Newsgroup Statistics Program
Version 1.1 (using News::Scan)

Copyright (C) 2002 Neil Lombardo,
Based on groupstat, Copyleft (C) 2000 H. Alex LaHurreau
Based on StatNews, Copyleft (C) 1998 Davide G. M. Salvetti

Newsgroup.................: demon.local
Stats Were Taken..........: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:00:01 GMT
Stats Begin...............: Fri, 07 Sep 2007 23:00:41 GMT
Stats End.................: Fri, 14 Sep 2007 22:25:55 GMT
Days......................: 7
Total No. of Articles.....: 1317
Total No. of Characters...: 5813916
Total Volume..............: 5677
Messages Per Day..........: 188.1
Characters Per Day........: 830559.4
Average Daily Volume......: 811 kB
Total Posters This Week...: 136
Messages with Sigs........: 13.82%
Sigs Over 4 Lines.........: 58.79%
Original Content Rating...: 15.33%

Top 500 Prolific Posters: Posts / Posts per Day / Percent Share
================================================== =============
1. Michael Baldwin...................................: 153 21.9 11.6%

Ding! Read it and weap, PHucker.

All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.

Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.

A vibrant life on usenet, yes ok......


And elsewhere. At least I don't have parrots squawking about the place
at all hours.


They shut up at night.


What? You tape their little beaks up?

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%

A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.

Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?

Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!

Conservation of angular momentum.


On what basis do you make that k'lame?


Physics.


What does that have to do with arses, PHucker?

When they found out their wives were attending a sex-toy party,
the husbands refused to go and pick them up,
and instead left them to their own devices.


That was lame.


But amusing.


Indeed.

When Ma & Pa first arrived on the homestead Pa installed a bell on the front porch and told Ma if trouble comes while I'm out in the field a plowin' then you just ring that bell and I'll come a running.
The next day Pa hears the bell and takes off for home. When he arrives Ma says, "Them boys are givin' me a hard time about doin' the chores and little Sammy done stuck the butter knife in the molasses without lickin' the blade clean first."
Pa says, "You mean I just run all the way in from the fields for this?? Next time it had better be important!"
The next day Pa hears the bell and takes off for home again. When he arrives his wife is in tears standing over a broke clothes line. "Pa", she says "some jackass came ridin' through here on a mule and ran right through the clothes line and rurnt the washin'." At first Pa was trying to figure out what was ridin' what but then he yells "I told you not to ring that bell unless something bad was goin' on. If this happens again I'm goin' to raise holy hell!!!"
The next day Pa hears the bell again and grabbin' up a board heads for home. When he arrives Ma is clinging to the porch rail with a spear in her back, the house behind her is in flames and the chickens are laying dead in the front yard, shot full of arrows.
Pa looks at Ma and says "Now that's more like it."


Now that was funny.

  #10  
Old September 22nd 07, 09:44 AM posted to demon.local,alt.talk.bollocks,comp.os.os2.advocacy,alt.astronomy,rec.aviation.products
Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 642
Default Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 14 Sep 2007.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Tue, 18 Sep 2007 03:31:31 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 17 Sep 2007 08:37:15 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 00:22:09 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
All you have proven is you have less of a life than me.

Au contraire, PHucker. If anything, I lead a more vibrant life than
you.

A vibrant life on usenet, yes ok......

And elsewhere. At least I don't have parrots squawking about the place
at all hours.

They shut up at night.


What? You tape their little beaks up?


I switch the lights off.


I see. Butt, of course, you wouldn't! A0L!

2. anonym............................................ : 115 16.4 8.7%
3. ah................................................ : 75 10.7 5.7%
4. @@^.............................................. : 73 10.4 5.5%
5. John \"C\.........................................: 68 9.7 5.2%
6. Paul {Hamilton Rooney}............................: 62 8.9 4.7%
7. Naked Gonad.......................................: 54 7.7 4.1%
8. Mr Pounder........................................: 53 7.6 4.0%
9. Peter Hucker......................................: 50 7.1 3.8%

A0L! Barely scraped into the top 10.

Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?

Why would you wiggle your arse when brushing you teeth? ... oh!

Conservation of angular momentum.

On what basis do you make that k'lame?

Physics.


What does that have to do with arses, PHucker?


Angular arse rotation is due to physics.


I suspect you like to get physical with arses.

When they found out their wives were attending a sex-toy party,
the husbands refused to go and pick them up,
and instead left them to their own devices.

That was lame.

But amusing.


Indeed.


[Bows]


Don't flatter yourself.

When Ma & Pa first arrived on the homestead Pa installed a bell on the front porch and told Ma if trouble comes while I'm out in the field a plowin' then you just ring that bell and I'll come a running.
The next day Pa hears the bell and takes off for home. When he arrives Ma says, "Them boys are givin' me a hard time about doin' the chores and little Sammy done stuck the butter knife in the molasses without lickin' the blade clean first."
Pa says, "You mean I just run all the way in from the fields for this?? Next time it had better be important!"
The next day Pa hears the bell and takes off for home again. When he arrives his wife is in tears standing over a broke clothes line. "Pa", she says "some jackass came ridin' through here on a mule and ran right through the clothes line and rurnt the washin'." At first Pa was trying to figure out what was ridin' what but then he yells "I told you not to ring that bell unless something bad was goin' on. If this happens again I'm goin' to raise holy hell!!!"
The next day Pa hears the bell again and grabbin' up a board heads for home. When he arrives Ma is clinging to the porch rail with a spear in her back, the house behind her is in flames and the chickens are laying dead in the front yard, shot full of arrows.
Pa looks at Ma and says "Now that's more like it."


Now that was funny.


[bows again]


Turkey.

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?


Why ask me?

 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Monthly News Statistics for demon.local: month of Aug 2007. Peter Hucker[_2_] Products 91 November 4th 07 06:42 AM
Weekly News Statistics for demon.local: week ending 17 Aug 2007. Michael Baldwin, Bruce[_2_] Products 4 August 24th 07 01:29 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 01:29 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2004-2020 AviationBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.