Some Military Truisms

Saw this in another group. I'm sure that some have seen it.
This is for the folks (like me) for whom they're new.
And yes, it has some aviation stuff...



Our Military's Wit and Wisdom,
OR the Military's version of Murphy's Law.

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher
fire when you least expect it. That would make you
quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on
US Rocket Launcher
-----------------------------------------------------------
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
- US Marine Corps
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Cluster bombing from B-52s are very, very accurate.
The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
- USAF Ammo Troop
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over
the area you just bombed." - US Air Force Manual
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously
never encountered automatic weapons." - General MacArthur
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"You, you, and you ... Panic. The rest of you, come with
me." - US Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Tracers work both ways." - US Army Ordnance
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Five second fuses only last three seconds."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
- David Hackworth
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If your attack is going too well, your walking into an ambush."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Any ship can be a minesweeper... once." - Anonymous
------------------------------ ----------------------------
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
- Unknown Marine Recruit
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
- Your Buddies
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him."
- USAF Ammo Troop
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ... I Shall Fear
No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing." - At the
entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena, Japan
-----------------------------------------------------------
"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3."
- Paul F.Crickmore (test pilot)
-----------------------------------------------------------
"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire."
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean
than submarines in the sky." --From an old carrier sailor
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's
probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."
------------------------------------------------------------
"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always
have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."
------------------------------------------------------------
"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and
pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up,
the pilot dies."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Never trade luck for skill."
------------------------------------------------------------
The two most common expressions (or famous last words) in
aviation a "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?"
------------------------------------------------------------
"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left
one up there!"
------------------------------------------------------------
"Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight
bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your
plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding
or doing anything about it."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral
will be held on a sunny day."
------------------------------------------------------------
Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII: "When a prang (crash)
seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest
object in the vicinity as slow and gently as possible."
-------------------------------------------------------------
"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can
just barely kill you."
- Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)
-------------------------------------------------------------
"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you."
-------------------------------------------------------------
"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime."
- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ,
-------------------------------------------------------------
"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Basic Flying Rules: "Try to stay in the middle of the air.
Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be
recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees
and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there."
--------------------------------------------------------------
As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft,
having torn off the wings and tail in a crash landing, the
crash truck arrives, the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and
asks "What happened?". The pilot's reply:"I don't know, I
just got here myself!"
- Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

Ronnie wrote:
Saw this in another group. I'm sure that some have seen it.
This is for the folks (like me) for whom they're new.
And yes, it has some aviation stuff...



Our Military's Wit and Wisdom,
OR the Military's version of Murphy's Law.

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher
fire when you least expect it. That would make you
quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on
US Rocket Launcher
-----------------------------------------------------------
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
- US Marine Corps
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Cluster bombing from B-52s are very, very accurate.
The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
- USAF Ammo Troop
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over
the area you just bombed." - US Air Force Manual
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously
never encountered automatic weapons." - General MacArthur
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"You, you, and you ... Panic. The rest of you, come with
me." - US Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Tracers work both ways." - US Army Ordnance
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Five second fuses only last three seconds."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
- David Hackworth
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If your attack is going too well, your walking into an ambush."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------------
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Any ship can be a minesweeper... once." - Anonymous
------------------------------ ----------------------------
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
- Unknown Marine Recruit
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
- Your Buddies
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him."
- USAF Ammo Troop
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ... I Shall Fear
No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing." - At the
entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena, Japan
-----------------------------------------------------------
"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3."
- Paul F.Crickmore (test pilot)
-----------------------------------------------------------
"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire."
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean
than submarines in the sky." --From an old carrier sailor
-----------------------------------------------------------
"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's
probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."
------------------------------------------------------------
"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always
have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."
------------------------------------------------------------
"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and
pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up,
the pilot dies."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Never trade luck for skill."
------------------------------------------------------------
The two most common expressions (or famous last words) in
aviation a "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?"
------------------------------------------------------------
"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left
one up there!"
------------------------------------------------------------
"Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight
bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your
plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding
or doing anything about it."
------------------------------------------------------------
"Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral
will be held on a sunny day."
------------------------------------------------------------
Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII: "When a prang (crash)
seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest
object in the vicinity as slow and gently as possible."
-------------------------------------------------------------
"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can
just barely kill you."
- Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)
-------------------------------------------------------------
"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you."
-------------------------------------------------------------
"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime."
- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ,
-------------------------------------------------------------
"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Basic Flying Rules: "Try to stay in the middle of the air.
Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be
recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees
and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there."
--------------------------------------------------------------
As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft,
having torn off the wings and tail in a crash landing, the
crash truck arrives, the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and
asks "What happened?". The pilot's reply:"I don't know, I
just got here myself!"
- Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

Thanks Ronnie,

Good for a chuckle or two.

--
Moving things in still pictures!