Can you answer these questions?

satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

wrote:

satire

Yes, but do I have to?

Humor appreciated, but at the same time, isn't the purpose of these forums
to help each other understand what we don't currently understand? A new
student pilot with no aviation background won't know that these aren't
"good" questions or that they aren't giving us enough information.

I work in the computer networking field and *CONSTANTLY* get questions from
business clients like "My computer at home keeps running out of memory, can
I put the 80 GB hard drive I saw at walmart in it?".......well, there are
about 15 areas of concern that I could come back and completely destroy the
person on in that one sentence. But, why? They don't know. They only know
that they are having a problem and are smart enough to ask for help.

Sorry, if we've offended you with our ignorance in the past. Let's talk
about RIP/RIP2 and IP routing sometime.

jf

wrote in message
oups.com...
satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

I just tell people they need to download some more memory off the internet.

They could try www.downloadfreememoryhere.com

If they are all out of memory at that site, I offer to email them some.

PJ

============================================
Here's to the duck who swam a lake and never lost a feather,
May sometime another year, we all be back together.
JJW
============================================
Jeff Franks" wrote in message
...
Humor appreciated, but at the same time, isn't the purpose of these forums
to help each other understand what we don't currently understand? A new
student pilot with no aviation background won't know that these aren't
"good" questions or that they aren't giving us enough information.

I work in the computer networking field and *CONSTANTLY* get questions
from
business clients like "My computer at home keeps running out of memory,
can
I put the 80 GB hard drive I saw at walmart in it?".......well, there are
about 15 areas of concern that I could come back and completely destroy
the
person on in that one sentence. But, why? They don't know. They only
know
that they are having a problem and are smart enough to ask for help.

Sorry, if we've offended you with our ignorance in the past. Let's talk
about RIP/RIP2 and IP routing sometime.

jf

wrote in message
oups.com...
satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

I tried to download that memory. Bad link. Can you please check the link
and post the right one for downloading memory. I'd like about 1 Gig. And I
need it by tomorrow, so I can save a large amount of data to my hard drive.

Thanks!

-Frank

"PJ Hunt" wrote in message
...
I just tell people they need to download some more memory off the internet.

They could try www.downloadfreememoryhere.com

If they are all out of memory at that site, I offer to email them some.

PJ

============================================
Here's to the duck who swam a lake and never lost a feather,
May sometime another year, we all be back together.
JJW
============================================
Jeff Franks" wrote in message
...
Humor appreciated, but at the same time, isn't the purpose of these
forums
to help each other understand what we don't currently understand? A new
student pilot with no aviation background won't know that these aren't
"good" questions or that they aren't giving us enough information.

I work in the computer networking field and *CONSTANTLY* get questions
from
business clients like "My computer at home keeps running out of memory,
can
I put the 80 GB hard drive I saw at walmart in it?".......well, there are
about 15 areas of concern that I could come back and completely destroy
the
person on in that one sentence. But, why? They don't know. They only
know
that they are having a problem and are smart enough to ask for help.

Sorry, if we've offended you with our ignorance in the past. Let's talk
about RIP/RIP2 and IP routing sometime.

jf

wrote in message
oups.com...
satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

That link may have a broken sparkalator or fluxmotometer. Try it again later
and if it doesn't work I'll see if I have any extra lying around here I can
email you.

PJ

============================================
Here's to the duck who swam a lake and never lost a feather,
May sometime another year, we all be back together.
JJW
============================================

"Frankster" wrote in message
...
I tried to download that memory. Bad link. Can you please check the link
and post the right one for downloading memory. I'd like about 1 Gig. And
I
need it by tomorrow, so I can save a large amount of data to my hard
drive.

Thanks!

-Frank

"PJ Hunt" wrote in message
...
I just tell people they need to download some more memory off the
internet.

They could try www.downloadfreememoryhere.com

If they are all out of memory at that site, I offer to email them some.

PJ

============================================
Here's to the duck who swam a lake and never lost a feather,
May sometime another year, we all be back together.
JJW
============================================
Jeff Franks" wrote in message
...
Humor appreciated, but at the same time, isn't the purpose of these
forums
to help each other understand what we don't currently understand? A
new
student pilot with no aviation background won't know that these aren't
"good" questions or that they aren't giving us enough information.

I work in the computer networking field and *CONSTANTLY* get questions
from
business clients like "My computer at home keeps running out of memory,
can
I put the 80 GB hard drive I saw at walmart in it?".......well, there
are
about 15 areas of concern that I could come back and completely destroy
the
person on in that one sentence. But, why? They don't know. They only
know
that they are having a problem and are smart enough to ask for help.

Sorry, if we've offended you with our ignorance in the past. Let's
talk
about RIP/RIP2 and IP routing sometime.

jf

wrote in message
oups.com...
satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for
that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which
one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if
I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going
to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

I just use a backpack...it fits nicely between the seats in the Caravan.

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

Things to hold the aftermath of bodily
functions...see---http://forums.flightinfo.com/showthread.php?t=44435

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

One that doesn't use up all your battery power by just sitting there (like mine
do).

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?


The one where the microphone doesn't work.

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

RayBan Aviators...or those General Macarther ones they used to have.

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

An F-104

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?



No...

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.


Wuss...Be a man and see what you are going to hit.





-John
*You are nothing until you have flown a Douglas, Lockheed, Grumman or North
American*

somebody didnt catch the joke

"Ditch" wrote in message
...
(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

I just use a backpack...it fits nicely between the seats in the Caravan.

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

Things to hold the aftermath of bodily
functions...see---http://forums.flightinfo.com/showthread.php?t=44435

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

One that doesn't use up all your battery power by just sitting there (like
mine
do).

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I buy
for her?


The one where the microphone doesn't work.

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

RayBan Aviators...or those General Macarther ones they used to have.

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

An F-104

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me if I
should become a professional pilot?



No...

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.


Wuss...Be a man and see what you are going to hit.





-John
*You are nothing until you have flown a Douglas, Lockheed, Grumman or
North
American*

Jeff,

My post was made tongue-in-cheek. I ruined the satire by marking it
"satire" for the humour impaired, still no luck...

See Satire in dictionary:

Sati n. 1.a. ... work that attacks human folly through irony,
derision, or wit.

FWIW, I have made my share of silly posts and silly questions in this
forum and learned from the replies.

And I accept your offer to talk about IP routing any time. you will
find that I have worked in the networking field for 13 years and have
learned a bit.




Jeff wrote:
I work in the computer networking field and *CONSTANTLY* get
questions from
business clients like "My computer at home keeps running out of
memory, can
I put the 80 GB hard drive I saw at walmart in it?".......well, there
are
about 15 areas of concern that I could come back and completely
destroy the
person on in that one sentence. But, why? They don't know. They
only know
that they are having a problem and are smart enough to ask for help.

Sorry, if we've offended you with our ignorance in the past. Let's
talk
about RIP/RIP2 and IP routing sometime.

jf

wrote in message
oups.com...
satire

(1) I gotta buy a flight bag. Which one should I buy?

(2) What should I keep in that flight bag?

(3) Which flash light should I buy for night flight?

(4) My wife needs a headset. Given that you do not know her or for
that
matter, haven't seen her, Can you tell me which headset should I
buy
for her?

(5) I just soloed, which sunglasses do I need?

(6) I got to buy a plane this month to get a huge tax break. Which
one?
Oh! and in another thread, I have posted a question about whether
to
save a few bucks on a transceiver by not getting the nav feature.

(7) I am a enter profession here. I like flying, can you tell me
if I
should become a professional pilot?

/satire

p.s.:

[instrcutor to student on a night flight]: In case you have an
engine
failure at night and you are going down for an off-airport landing,
remember to turn the landing light on so you see where you are
going to
crash.

[student]: What if I don't like what I see?
[instructor]: Turn the light off.

somebody didnt catch the joke


Yes, I caught it very well, thank you.

If you read the replies, they were a joke (well...mostly) as well. Who didn't
catch the joke?




-John
*You are nothing until you have flown a Douglas, Lockheed, Grumman or North
American*