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#1
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Bible-beater pilots
Yesterday was clear, in the 60s (in November in Iowa!), and -- best of
all -- our day off. With the kids in school, and the plane fully fueled, it was off to...where? Prairie du Chein, sitting at the confluence of the Mississippi and Wisconsin Rivers, beckoned, with its beautiful approaches, favorable runways, and a riverboat casino that would fetch us over to their excellent lunch buffet. So, we pointed Atlas in that general direction, and puttered our way to Wisconsin at a paltry 109 knots -- we were bucking a 35 knot headwind all the way! Luckily, above 3500 feet it was smooth as a baby's bottom. Calling PDC from 10 minutes out, we asked them to call the casino's courtesy vehicle for us. To our surprise, they announced that it was "already on the way" -- apparently someone was there ahead of us, and had already made the call. After a beautiful (if bumpy) approach (thanks to the wind hitting the huge bluffs that line the river by PDC) I taxied up to the terminal, and parked next to a gorgeous blood-red Mooney. It was immaculate, and the paint really set it apart. Upon strolling inside, we discovered two older gentlemen, one of whom owned the Mooney -- evidently the folks who had called the casino. The courtesy van was already there, so we hopped in the back and all rode over together. The usual introductions were made, and standard pilot talk ensued. It turned out that the Mooney was a '67 model, and both guys were retired and in their mid-70s. One had been a Sears store manager for many years, and the other -- the owner of the Mooney -- was a successful real estate developer. The conversation flowed smoothly, and the ride went quickly. As we disembarked from the van, we bid them adieu and went our separate ways. In the buffet line, we ran into them again. While I was filling my salad bowl, the old Sears manager asked me if we cared to join them for lunch? Since we were sans kids, and they were mighty nice company, Mary and I allowed that joining them was a grand idea, and proceeded to confuse the wait staff by moving our beverages across the room to their table. Once we were all seated with our food, the real estate guy announced that it was their habit to pray before meals, and asked if we might join them. I frankly found this a bit odd, in a casino buffet, but to be polite we affirmed the idea and bowed our heads while the Sears guy recited a prayer about safe flying and good eating. Mary and I exchanged the old "uh-oh" glance, but we still hoped that things would progress normally. It was not to be. As lunch proceeded, we began discussing Iowa City, and how terrific the school system was, and they guided the conversation uncomfortably into what church we attended with our kids. Mary struggled bravely to answer that question in a way that wouldn't offend these obviously religious men, but there was simply no way to hide the fact that we didn't take them to ANY church. I then proceeded to explain that we had both been raised hyper-Catholic, and had been bludgeoned to death with our heavy-handed religious upbringings. We were going to let our children decide their religion when they reached the age of reason. This was a mistake. I might as well have tossed blood into shark-infested waters. The next question, after a pause, was from the Sears guy, asking whether we had Gideon bibles in our hotel suites. I chuckled, and allowed that we did. I then went on to say how we'd even seen some competition amongst the various religious sects in town, with the Mormons trying to get us to put their "Book of Mormon" texts in all the suites, too. Still chuckling, I remarked that we had to draw the line somewhere, or we'd have to put the Koran and the Hindu texts in the suites, too. This was another mistake. The Sears guy turned out to be a Gideon, and he didn't warm to the notion that I was equating his King James Bible with the Koran. Soon, both men were quoting scripture to us, chapter and verse, "proving" how "easy" it was to be "saved" by the "true Lord, Jesus", as opposed to the heathen gods of the other religions. By now we were both growing incredibly uncomfortable, and I had that horrible "this must be a nightmare" feeling rising in the pit of my stomach. Not knowing whether to bolt or tell them to f*ck off, I just sat there silently, dumbly smiling at them in disbelief. Then the Sears guy asked me if I knew how "truly easy" it was to be "saved"? I replied, quite honestly, "no". (ANOTHER mistake!) He then told me that I didn't have to close my eyes, nor did I even have to be in church -- I only had to say the following prayer along with him, giving myself over to Jesus Christ. He then asked, directly, "Would I be willing to say this little prayer aloud with him?" The heat in my face was really rising now, and I felt like everyone in that casino was staring DIRECTLY at the back of my head. What could I say to someone so earnest, yet so incredibly rude? I smiled, placed my hand firmly on his shoulder, and told him that I most certainly was NOT going to pray with him in a casino. I then went back to eating, trying to think of some way -- ANY way -- to escape this insane situation. Mary finally came up with the answer -- she bolted, and went to the bathroom! Abandoned, I was a helpless target for their religious zeal, and felt myself being carried along by their verbal diarrhea. There was simply no escape, and I politely listened while they explained to me everything from everlasting salvation, to the tax advantages of tithing 20% of my income to the church... At last Mary returned, and announced that we were late to get back to pick up the kids from school. Never had I been so grateful for bad news in my life, and I quickly jumped up, shook both their hands, thanked them for an "interesting" lunch, and headed toward the door, on the double. Feeling like I'd just been delivered from the Gates of Hell, we told the driver (the same guy who had picked us up) about the two bible-beater pilots. He was as dumb-founded as we were, and apologized profusely, as if he had just forced us to eat lunch with a couple of sloppy drunks. He allowed that their kind was exceedingly rare at the casino -- an observation that made us laugh out loud. We then warned him to keep his mouth shut when he gave them a ride back, or risk wasting the entire afternoon, which got him chuckling -- until his radio crackled to life, and the dispatcher announced that he had "Two more to go back to the airport" when he got back. His face fell as he knew that deliverance would not be his today... Then it was *our* turn to laugh! Our flight home was fast (175 knots, thanks to that tail wind) and uneventful, but our lunch had been completely ruined, and we could only shake our heads in wonder at the audacity of these men. The gall and sheer tastelessness of their behavior had us recounting every detail of the experience all the way home, as if we had just witnessed a train wreck. We realized (with a shudder) that these men were only one or two steps removed from the Islamo-Fascists we are currently fighting in the Middle East, the only difference being their hair style and their dogma. Until yesterday I had run into religious fanatics and cult followers in every walk of life EXCEPT aviation. I guess I had assumed that anyone smart enough to get their pilot's certificate couldn't be so gullible -- and rude -- as to go around trying to "save" perfect strangers. I still have a hard time believing that it wasn't some sort of a "Candid Camera" set up, but I'm afraid they really, honestly thought they were doing the right thing. Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do? -- Jay Honeck Iowa City, IA Pathfinder N56993 www.AlexisParkInn.com "Your Aviation Destination" |
#2
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"Jay Honeck" wrote in message news:Wwfvb.262377$Fm2.278122@attbi_s04... Yesterday was clear, in the 60s (in November in Iowa!), and -- best of all -- our day off. With the kids in school, and the plane fully fueled, it was off to...where? Prairie du Chein, sitting at the confluence of the Mississippi and Wisconsin Rivers, beckoned, with its beautiful approaches, favorable runways, and a riverboat casino that would fetch us over to their excellent lunch buffet. So, we pointed Atlas in that general direction, and puttered our way to Wisconsin at a paltry 109 knots -- we were bucking a 35 knot headwind all the way! Luckily, above 3500 feet it was smooth as a baby's bottom. Calling PDC from 10 minutes out, we asked them to call the casino's courtesy vehicle for us. To our surprise, they announced that it was "already on the way" -- apparently someone was there ahead of us, and had already made the call. After a beautiful (if bumpy) approach (thanks to the wind hitting the huge bluffs that line the river by PDC) I taxied up to the terminal, and parked next to a gorgeous blood-red Mooney. It was immaculate, and the paint really set it apart. Upon strolling inside, we discovered two older gentlemen, one of whom owned the Mooney -- evidently the folks who had called the casino. The courtesy van was already there, so we hopped in the back and all rode over together. The usual introductions were made, and standard pilot talk ensued. It turned out that the Mooney was a '67 model, and both guys were retired and in their mid-70s. One had been a Sears store manager for many years, and the other -- the owner of the Mooney -- was a successful real estate developer. The conversation flowed smoothly, and the ride went quickly. As we disembarked from the van, we bid them adieu and went our separate ways. In the buffet line, we ran into them again. While I was filling my salad bowl, the old Sears manager asked me if we cared to join them for lunch? Since we were sans kids, and they were mighty nice company, Mary and I allowed that joining them was a grand idea, and proceeded to confuse the wait staff by moving our beverages across the room to their table. Once we were all seated with our food, the real estate guy announced that it was their habit to pray before meals, and asked if we might join them. I frankly found this a bit odd, in a casino buffet, but to be polite we affirmed the idea and bowed our heads while the Sears guy recited a prayer about safe flying and good eating. Mary and I exchanged the old "uh-oh" glance, but we still hoped that things would progress normally. It was not to be. As lunch proceeded, we began discussing Iowa City, and how terrific the school system was, and they guided the conversation uncomfortably into what church we attended with our kids. Mary struggled bravely to answer that question in a way that wouldn't offend these obviously religious men, but there was simply no way to hide the fact that we didn't take them to ANY church. I then proceeded to explain that we had both been raised hyper-Catholic, and had been bludgeoned to death with our heavy-handed religious upbringings. We were going to let our children decide their religion when they reached the age of reason. This was a mistake. I might as well have tossed blood into shark-infested waters. The next question, after a pause, was from the Sears guy, asking whether we had Gideon bibles in our hotel suites. I chuckled, and allowed that we did. I then went on to say how we'd even seen some competition amongst the various religious sects in town, with the Mormons trying to get us to put their "Book of Mormon" texts in all the suites, too. Still chuckling, I remarked that we had to draw the line somewhere, or we'd have to put the Koran and the Hindu texts in the suites, too. This was another mistake. The Sears guy turned out to be a Gideon, and he didn't warm to the notion that I was equating his King James Bible with the Koran. Soon, both men were quoting scripture to us, chapter and verse, "proving" how "easy" it was to be "saved" by the "true Lord, Jesus", as opposed to the heathen gods of the other religions. By now we were both growing incredibly uncomfortable, and I had that horrible "this must be a nightmare" feeling rising in the pit of my stomach. Not knowing whether to bolt or tell them to f*ck off, I just sat there silently, dumbly smiling at them in disbelief. Then the Sears guy asked me if I knew how "truly easy" it was to be "saved"? I replied, quite honestly, "no". (ANOTHER mistake!) He then told me that I didn't have to close my eyes, nor did I even have to be in church -- I only had to say the following prayer along with him, giving myself over to Jesus Christ. He then asked, directly, "Would I be willing to say this little prayer aloud with him?" The heat in my face was really rising now, and I felt like everyone in that casino was staring DIRECTLY at the back of my head. What could I say to someone so earnest, yet so incredibly rude? I smiled, placed my hand firmly on his shoulder, and told him that I most certainly was NOT going to pray with him in a casino. I then went back to eating, trying to think of some way -- ANY way -- to escape this insane situation. Mary finally came up with the answer -- she bolted, and went to the bathroom! Abandoned, I was a helpless target for their religious zeal, and felt myself being carried along by their verbal diarrhea. There was simply no escape, and I politely listened while they explained to me everything from everlasting salvation, to the tax advantages of tithing 20% of my income to the church... At last Mary returned, and announced that we were late to get back to pick up the kids from school. Never had I been so grateful for bad news in my life, and I quickly jumped up, shook both their hands, thanked them for an "interesting" lunch, and headed toward the door, on the double. Feeling like I'd just been delivered from the Gates of Hell, we told the driver (the same guy who had picked us up) about the two bible-beater pilots. He was as dumb-founded as we were, and apologized profusely, as if he had just forced us to eat lunch with a couple of sloppy drunks. He allowed that their kind was exceedingly rare at the casino -- an observation that made us laugh out loud. We then warned him to keep his mouth shut when he gave them a ride back, or risk wasting the entire afternoon, which got him chuckling -- until his radio crackled to life, and the dispatcher announced that he had "Two more to go back to the airport" when he got back. His face fell as he knew that deliverance would not be his today... Then it was *our* turn to laugh! Our flight home was fast (175 knots, thanks to that tail wind) and uneventful, but our lunch had been completely ruined, and we could only shake our heads in wonder at the audacity of these men. The gall and sheer tastelessness of their behavior had us recounting every detail of the experience all the way home, as if we had just witnessed a train wreck. We realized (with a shudder) that these men were only one or two steps removed from the Islamo-Fascists we are currently fighting in the Middle East, the only difference being their hair style and their dogma. Until yesterday I had run into religious fanatics and cult followers in every walk of life EXCEPT aviation. I guess I had assumed that anyone smart enough to get their pilot's certificate couldn't be so gullible -- and rude -- as to go around trying to "save" perfect strangers. I still have a hard time believing that it wasn't some sort of a "Candid Camera" set up, but I'm afraid they really, honestly thought they were doing the right thing. Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do? -- Jay Honeck Iowa City, IA Pathfinder N56993 www.AlexisParkInn.com "Your Aviation Destination" Did ya get their N number? If so I'll paint it on the ramp at PDC with a warning next time we are there. Wonder what they would have said had you questioned them about being in a casino? |
#3
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Does this mean next year's Prayer Meeting Party at your campsite at Oshkosh is canceled? Or will each swallow of cold beer be followed by "Amen" or "Praise the Lord"? |
#4
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Does this mean next year's Prayer Meeting Party at your campsite at
Oshkosh is canceled? The closest I get to a prayer meeting in OSH is when I start praying that the yodeler chokes on his Zaug's breakfast before morning... :-) -- Jay Honeck Iowa City, IA Pathfinder N56993 www.AlexisParkInn.com "Your Aviation Destination" |
#5
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Jay Honeck wrote:
snip Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do? Jay, I have a lot of respect for people who are comfortable with their religion, as I am not. However, in this case I would have excused myself from the table without another word. People who feel they must force their beliefs on me are not showing me respect, therefore it is not hard for me to return the gesture. -- Peter Still anonymous... ----== Posted via Newsfeed.Com - Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==---- http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 100,000 Newsgroups ---= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers - Total Privacy via Encryption =--- |
#6
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Lol - it might behoove them to actually read that bible they supposedly live
by. Next time tell them you do not wish to be required to hate your family (Luke 14:26) nor be required to give away your airplane and all your other worldly posessions (Matthew 19:16-21. See also Luke 12:33) nor sell your daughter into slavery (Exodus 21:7-10) etc.. etc.. It makes sense you are a heathen Jay, as God made you evil because you are bald (Jeremiah 47:5) - so you really can't help yourself. It sounds like you might like http://www.ffrf.org Or http://landoverbaptist.org |
#7
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Jay Honeck wrote:
Until yesterday I had run into religious fanatics and cult followers in every walk of life EXCEPT aviation. I guess I had assumed that anyone smart enough to get their pilot's certificate couldn't be so gullible -- and rude -- as to go around trying to "save" perfect strangers. I still have a hard time believing that it wasn't some sort of a "Candid Camera" set up, but I'm afraid they really, honestly thought they were doing the right thing. Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do? You (and I) need to be careful about how we talk about this, and make sure it's clear that the "ignorance" and "rudeness" refers to how your companions tried to force their religion on you, and not on the fact that they are believers. Having said that, in a similar situation I would at first try to be polite. I would tell them that I have my own set of beliefs and that they may or may not be consistent with their beliefs, that I am comfortable in my beliefs, and that I don't feel anything would be accomplished by continuing the present direction of the conversation. If they persist, I would tell them flat out that I'm sorry, but it's apparent they aren't interested in a mutual conversation, and that I do not have the inclination to have someone else's religion forced down my throat. I would not worry about whether my last remark offended them, because it really isn't going to change their opinion of you. As far as they are concerned, unless you agree completely with their beliefs and practice the same rituals, your damned to hell anyway. You could be the Pope, but it doesn't make any difference to them - you don't believe in "the one true way", so you're damned. It's kind of frightening to think how similar they are to the radical Islamic fundamentalists, but it's even more frightening to realize that they don't see the similarities. |
#8
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Sorry about the bad lunch companions. We have these people around here too.
They are the only ones wearing ties in north Idaho so they are pretty easy to avoid. Tell them you are Catholic or Jewish and they will give up. It would be more fun to convince them that you are a Druid but it is easier to convince people that you belong to a less exotic religion. Mike MU-2 "Jay Honeck" wrote in message news:Wwfvb.262377$Fm2.278122@attbi_s04... Yesterday was clear, in the 60s (in November in Iowa!), and -- best of all -- our day off. With the kids in school, and the plane fully fueled, it was off to...where? Prairie du Chein, sitting at the confluence of the Mississippi and Wisconsin Rivers, beckoned, with its beautiful approaches, favorable runways, and a riverboat casino that would fetch us over to their excellent lunch buffet. So, we pointed Atlas in that general direction, and puttered our way to Wisconsin at a paltry 109 knots -- we were bucking a 35 knot headwind all the way! Luckily, above 3500 feet it was smooth as a baby's bottom. Calling PDC from 10 minutes out, we asked them to call the casino's courtesy vehicle for us. To our surprise, they announced that it was "already on the way" -- apparently someone was there ahead of us, and had already made the call. After a beautiful (if bumpy) approach (thanks to the wind hitting the huge bluffs that line the river by PDC) I taxied up to the terminal, and parked next to a gorgeous blood-red Mooney. It was immaculate, and the paint really set it apart. Upon strolling inside, we discovered two older gentlemen, one of whom owned the Mooney -- evidently the folks who had called the casino. The courtesy van was already there, so we hopped in the back and all rode over together. The usual introductions were made, and standard pilot talk ensued. It turned out that the Mooney was a '67 model, and both guys were retired and in their mid-70s. One had been a Sears store manager for many years, and the other -- the owner of the Mooney -- was a successful real estate developer. The conversation flowed smoothly, and the ride went quickly. As we disembarked from the van, we bid them adieu and went our separate ways. In the buffet line, we ran into them again. While I was filling my salad bowl, the old Sears manager asked me if we cared to join them for lunch? Since we were sans kids, and they were mighty nice company, Mary and I allowed that joining them was a grand idea, and proceeded to confuse the wait staff by moving our beverages across the room to their table. Once we were all seated with our food, the real estate guy announced that it was their habit to pray before meals, and asked if we might join them. I frankly found this a bit odd, in a casino buffet, but to be polite we affirmed the idea and bowed our heads while the Sears guy recited a prayer about safe flying and good eating. Mary and I exchanged the old "uh-oh" glance, but we still hoped that things would progress normally. It was not to be. As lunch proceeded, we began discussing Iowa City, and how terrific the school system was, and they guided the conversation uncomfortably into what church we attended with our kids. Mary struggled bravely to answer that question in a way that wouldn't offend these obviously religious men, but there was simply no way to hide the fact that we didn't take them to ANY church. I then proceeded to explain that we had both been raised hyper-Catholic, and had been bludgeoned to death with our heavy-handed religious upbringings. We were going to let our children decide their religion when they reached the age of reason. This was a mistake. I might as well have tossed blood into shark-infested waters. The next question, after a pause, was from the Sears guy, asking whether we had Gideon bibles in our hotel suites. I chuckled, and allowed that we did. I then went on to say how we'd even seen some competition amongst the various religious sects in town, with the Mormons trying to get us to put their "Book of Mormon" texts in all the suites, too. Still chuckling, I remarked that we had to draw the line somewhere, or we'd have to put the Koran and the Hindu texts in the suites, too. This was another mistake. The Sears guy turned out to be a Gideon, and he didn't warm to the notion that I was equating his King James Bible with the Koran. Soon, both men were quoting scripture to us, chapter and verse, "proving" how "easy" it was to be "saved" by the "true Lord, Jesus", as opposed to the heathen gods of the other religions. By now we were both growing incredibly uncomfortable, and I had that horrible "this must be a nightmare" feeling rising in the pit of my stomach. Not knowing whether to bolt or tell them to f*ck off, I just sat there silently, dumbly smiling at them in disbelief. Then the Sears guy asked me if I knew how "truly easy" it was to be "saved"? I replied, quite honestly, "no". (ANOTHER mistake!) He then told me that I didn't have to close my eyes, nor did I even have to be in church -- I only had to say the following prayer along with him, giving myself over to Jesus Christ. He then asked, directly, "Would I be willing to say this little prayer aloud with him?" The heat in my face was really rising now, and I felt like everyone in that casino was staring DIRECTLY at the back of my head. What could I say to someone so earnest, yet so incredibly rude? I smiled, placed my hand firmly on his shoulder, and told him that I most certainly was NOT going to pray with him in a casino. I then went back to eating, trying to think of some way -- ANY way -- to escape this insane situation. Mary finally came up with the answer -- she bolted, and went to the bathroom! Abandoned, I was a helpless target for their religious zeal, and felt myself being carried along by their verbal diarrhea. There was simply no escape, and I politely listened while they explained to me everything from everlasting salvation, to the tax advantages of tithing 20% of my income to the church... At last Mary returned, and announced that we were late to get back to pick up the kids from school. Never had I been so grateful for bad news in my life, and I quickly jumped up, shook both their hands, thanked them for an "interesting" lunch, and headed toward the door, on the double. Feeling like I'd just been delivered from the Gates of Hell, we told the driver (the same guy who had picked us up) about the two bible-beater pilots. He was as dumb-founded as we were, and apologized profusely, as if he had just forced us to eat lunch with a couple of sloppy drunks. He allowed that their kind was exceedingly rare at the casino -- an observation that made us laugh out loud. We then warned him to keep his mouth shut when he gave them a ride back, or risk wasting the entire afternoon, which got him chuckling -- until his radio crackled to life, and the dispatcher announced that he had "Two more to go back to the airport" when he got back. His face fell as he knew that deliverance would not be his today... Then it was *our* turn to laugh! Our flight home was fast (175 knots, thanks to that tail wind) and uneventful, but our lunch had been completely ruined, and we could only shake our heads in wonder at the audacity of these men. The gall and sheer tastelessness of their behavior had us recounting every detail of the experience all the way home, as if we had just witnessed a train wreck. We realized (with a shudder) that these men were only one or two steps removed from the Islamo-Fascists we are currently fighting in the Middle East, the only difference being their hair style and their dogma. Until yesterday I had run into religious fanatics and cult followers in every walk of life EXCEPT aviation. I guess I had assumed that anyone smart enough to get their pilot's certificate couldn't be so gullible -- and rude -- as to go around trying to "save" perfect strangers. I still have a hard time believing that it wasn't some sort of a "Candid Camera" set up, but I'm afraid they really, honestly thought they were doing the right thing. Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do? -- Jay Honeck Iowa City, IA Pathfinder N56993 www.AlexisParkInn.com "Your Aviation Destination" |
#9
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"Jay Honeck" wrote in message news:d5gvb.262620$Fm2.278685@attbi_s04... Does this mean next year's Prayer Meeting Party at your campsite at Oshkosh is canceled? The closest I get to a prayer meeting in OSH is when I start praying that the yodeler chokes on his Zaug's breakfast before morning... :-) -- Jay Honeck Iowa City, IA Pathfinder N56993 www.AlexisParkInn.com "Your Aviation Destination" One of my favorite prayers: http://home.austin.rr.com/johncarty/images/drglrg.gif |
#10
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Anyone ever run into this before? What did you do?
-- Jay Honeck I generally try the 'throw oneself down on the floor and start spinning in circles while spitting pea soup all-around' approach, that USUALLY gets 'em headed for the door - unless I try this in Berkeley, California, across the S.F. Bay from me; then they just assume I'm a street performer. GRIN ;-) Seriously, though, I just excuse myself from their company when they start to take advantage of my politeness/civility, as their protheleltising, progresses. -- -- Good Flights! Cecil E. Chapman, Jr. PP-ASEL "We who fly do so for the love of flying. We are alive in the air with this miracle that lies in our hands and beneath our feet" - Cecil Day Lewis- Check out my personal flying adventures: www.bayareapilot.com |
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