Monthly News Statistics for demon.local: month of Aug 2007.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:55:06 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you go http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

I want a video, not that crud.

Go out and rent or buy one then.

What? PAY for it? I don't think you've grasped the concept of the internet.

Unfortunately, I do. Now we have every cretin on it clogging it up.

Holly wrote:
Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.tx5fzta34buhsv@fx62...
On Tue, 04 Sep 2007 22:17:43 +0100, anonym

wrote:

"Mr Pounder" wrote in
message
...
"anonym" wrote in message
. ..
"Mr Pounder" wrote
in
message
k...
"anonym" wrote in message
. ..
"Mr Pounder"
wrote
in
message
k...

Are you saying he is a troll? Do you have proof
of
your
allegation?
If
so, post it in d.l and he will be banned from
posting
here.
Tell me just how you will ban me.

Mr Pounder
Why should you be banned?
Do not weasel with me.

Mr Pounder
Weasels are long established in the fauna of d.l,
though
stoats
are
a
quite
different matter. I would never stoat with you.
ALBATROSS! GET IT ON A STICK!

Something to do with The Ancient Mariner riding a
surfboard
to
hell
&
back
Sir?
No, its the Monty Python albatross sketch.
Show me that one.
Must I?
I cannot remember it.
OK, here you go
http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4
I want a video, not that crud.
Go out and rent or buy one then.

{Stoat}
What?
{Stoat}

HTH
Oh, I thought you said stout. I used to drink that.
So did I.
Now its all "lite" beers. Although I am partial to Floris
Kreik,
the
cherry beer from Belgium.
Cherry beer?!!!!!!!!
Its very nice. They also have a chocolate beer, which isn't as
tasty,
and a strawberry beer, which I haven't tried yet.
Yes, I'm sure they have.
I'll let you know when I try it next weekend.
No.
Honestly it's okay.
Stuff you! I plan to try it anyway and there's not a damn thing you
can do to stop me!
If you were my friend I would try to talk you out of this ghastly
experiment.
Why? What's wrong with it?
If you don't know you are beyond help.

Strawberry beer sounds delicious. What could possbily be wrong with
it?

Would you like to be my friend Bruce?
I have enough friends already, thank you very much.
Right! That's fine by me!

I couldn't possibly take any more in. You'd have to sleep in the
garage for starters.

You have a plan then?

Of my garage? You'll have to ask my architect.

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in
message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.tx5fzta34buhsv@fx62...
On Tue, 04 Sep 2007 22:17:43 +0100, anonym

wrote:

"Mr Pounder" wrote
in
message
...

"anonym" wrote in message
. ..

"Mr Pounder"
wrote
in
message
k...

"anonym" wrote in message
. ..

"Mr Pounder"
wrote
in
message
k...

Are you saying he is a troll? Do you have
proof
of
your
allegation?
If
so, post it in d.l and he will be banned from
posting
here.

Tell me just how you will ban me.

Mr Pounder

Why should you be banned?

Do not weasel with me.

Mr Pounder

Weasels are long established in the fauna of d.l,
though
stoats
are
a
quite
different matter. I would never stoat with you.

ALBATROSS! GET IT ON A STICK!

Something to do with The Ancient Mariner riding a
surfboard
to
hell
&
back
Sir?

No, its the Monty Python albatross sketch.

Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you go
http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

I want a video, not that crud.

Go out and rent or buy one then.

Try this:
http://monty.python.videowall.sytes.org/

Pure brilliance.

A tad old now though.

{Stoat}

What?

{Stoat}

HTH

Oh, I thought you said stout. I used to drink that.

So did I.

Now its all "lite" beers. Although I am partial to Floris
Kreik,
the
cherry beer from Belgium.

Cherry beer?!!!!!!!!

Its very nice. They also have a chocolate beer, which isn't as
tasty,
and a strawberry beer, which I haven't tried yet.

Yes, I'm sure they have.

I'll let you know when I try it next weekend.

No.
Honestly it's okay.

Stuff you! I plan to try it anyway and there's not a damn thing you
can do to stop me!

If you were my friend I would try to talk you out of this ghastly
experiment.

Why? What's wrong with it?

If you don't know you are beyond help.

Strawberry beer sounds delicious. What could possibly be wrong with
it?

ffs.

Who is Frank Foster-Smith?

Would you like to be my friend Bruce?

I have enough friends already, thank you very much.

Right! That's fine by me!

I couldn't possbily take any more in. You'd have to sleep in the
garage for starters.

What comes after starters?

Mains usually.

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ps.com...
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:55:06 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce
wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you go http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

Curses, you beat me to it.
It was my link anyway, not yours!

What you mean "your link", white man?

I want a video, not that crud.

Go out and rent or buy one then.

What? PAY for it? I don't think you've grasped the concept of the
internet.

Unfortunately, I do. Now we have every cretin on it clogging it up.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 15:21:31 +0100, Mr Pounder wrote:

"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.typgciv84buhsv@fx62...
On Wed, 12 Sep 2007 03:15:49 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce
wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ps.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Mr Hucker is a friend of mine.

Why?

Because he is radical, self opinionated, bombastic, argumentative &
never
gives up.
Because he works hard for a living, has his own home & loves his
pets.
Because I respect him.

He sounds like a kook, now that you mention it.

Define "kook".

Don't mention it.

Oh, I forgot to mention that he has been on groups for much longer than
you
or I.
He will still be here when you are gone.

Since when? I have been reading Usenet since 1984. Since it started in
1979, he could hardly have been reading it for much longer than me.

1984? That makes you an ubergeek. I always thought you were odd.

Fight!

Select weapon!

Phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range.

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 09:00:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:55:06 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you go http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

I want a video, not that crud.

Go out and rent or buy one then.

What? PAY for it? I don't think you've grasped the concept of the internet.

Unfortunately, I do. Now we have every cretin on it clogging it up.

And just what is this concept we are ****ing up?

Who said anything about ****ing?

15 Easy Steps to Poo like a Woman:
1. Under no circumstances use any other toilet than your own, regardless of any stomach pain may be caused whilst waiting to get home.
2. With the toilet-brush, clean any residue left on the pan by your boyfriend / husband. Also wipe his pubic hair off the seat with some toilet paper.
3. Flush the toilet before starting. Then wash your hands.
4. Line the toilet seat with toilet paper (as other people may have sat on the toilet since it was last bleached).
5. Stuff toilet paper inside the pan to prevent splash-back.
6. Pull panties down and sit. Some women may still prefer to squat over the seat as opposed to taking the risk of touching it with bare flesh.
7. Release solids, but strain to avoid making any sounds.
8. Rise and quickly flush before direct eye-contact is made with any faeces.
9. Take a length of toilet paper and fold it several times to positively guarantee that no residue will touch bare skin (about five or six applications per roll).
10. Wipe once and throw paper into the pan. Do not look at the paper.
11. Repeat steps 9 and 10 at least thirty times. It may be necessary to yell for your boyfriend/husband to find some more rolls to pass through the door while promising not to open his eyes or pass any comments. It is traditional to do this while he is trying to watch sport.
12. Flush the toilet and replace the lid.
13. Wash hands at least three times with disinfectant soap.
14. Open all windows and spray approximately half-a-can of air freshener.
15. Pick up all reading material left behind by your boyfriend/husband and leave bathroom, closing the door firmly behind you.

Do fat bitches do it any different?

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 17 Sep 2007 08:39:23 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Would you like to be my friend Bruce?

I have enough friends already, thank you very much.

Right! That's fine by me!

I couldn't possibly take any more in. You'd have to sleep in the
garage for starters.

What comes after starters?

Mains usually.

It is not advisable to plug yourself into the mains while eating, it can cause indigestion.

I find that revelation to be quite shocking. I also find what fat
people eat to be disgusting.

Holly wrote:
On Sep 17, 10:38 pm, "Michael Baldwin, Bruce"
wrote:
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 09:00:35 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:55:06 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
groups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
roups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you gohttp://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

I want a video, not that crud.

Go out and rent or buy one then.

What? PAY for it? I don't think you've grasped the concept of the internet.

Unfortunately, I do. Now we have every cretin on it clogging it up.

And just what is this concept we are ****ing up?

Who said anything about ****ing?


15 Easy Steps to Poo like a Woman:
1. Under no circumstances use any other toilet than your own, regardless of any stomach pain may be caused whilst waiting to get home.
2. With the toilet-brush, clean any residue left on the pan by your boyfriend / husband. Also wipe his pubic hair off the seat with some toilet paper.
3. Flush the toilet before starting. Then wash your hands.
4. Line the toilet seat with toilet paper (as other people may have sat on the toilet since it was last bleached).
5. Stuff toilet paper inside the pan to prevent splash-back.
6. Pull panties down and sit. Some women may still prefer to squat over the seat as opposed to taking the risk of touching it with bare flesh.
7. Release solids, but strain to avoid making any sounds.
8. Rise and quickly flush before direct eye-contact is made with any faeces.
9. Take a length of toilet paper and fold it several times to positively guarantee that no residue will touch bare skin (about five or six applications per roll).
10. Wipe once and throw paper into the pan. Do not look at the paper.
11. Repeat steps 9 and 10 at least thirty times. It may be necessary to yell for your boyfriend/husband to find some more rolls to pass through the door while promising not to open his eyes or pass any comments. It is traditional to do this while he is trying to watch sport.
12. Flush the toilet and replace the lid.
13. Wash hands at least three times with disinfectant soap.
14. Open all windows and spray approximately half-a-can of air freshener.
15. Pick up all reading material left behind by your boyfriend/husband and leave bathroom, closing the door firmly behind you.

Do fat bitches do it any different?-

Like you don't know. giggle

Like I'm ever going to want to even consider watching you take a dump.

I fink you misspelled "cat."

We're not discussing pussies in this thread.

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ps.com...
Peter Hucker wrote:
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:55:06 +0100, Michael Baldwin, Bruce
wrote:

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
ups.com...
Mr Pounder wrote:
Show me that one.

Must I?

I cannot remember it.

OK, here you go http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode13.htm#4

Curses, you beat me to it.
It was my link anyway, not yours!

What you mean "your link", white man?

I sent him the link.
HTH.

OIC. You are selfish and unwilling to share.

Mr Pounder wrote:
"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.tys7a1zn4buhsv@fx62...
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 18:17:46 +0100, Mr Pounder
wrote:

"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.tyq92tln4buhsv@fx62...
On Sun, 16 Sep 2007 15:27:24 +0100, Mr Pounder
wrote:


"Peter Hucker" wrote in message
newsp.typga8zr4buhsv@fx62...
On Mon, 10 Sep 2007 21:09:11 +0100, Mr Pounder
wrote:


"Michael Baldwin, Bruce" wrote in message
oups.com...

Because he is radical, self opinionated, bombastic, argumentative &
never
gives up.

I thought those were things that irrtated you.

Not at all.
Think again.

You are always complaining whenever I say something radical.

I do not complain, I post a comment.

You disagree with it.

Because he works hard for a living,

Unlike you who con people out of new fire extinguishers and get paid
more
than the ****ing prime minister.

Football players & Terry Wogan get paid more than the Prime Minister.

You're not counting the backhander quangos.

I am paid for my worth.

You are an unskilled labourer.

Sometimes I wish I was.

You once told me that "anyone can do it", when telling me I should be
doing a job like yours.

With the correct training, experiance & IQ.

I con nobody.

All safety officers con people.

I am not a safety officer.

You replace faulty fire extinguishers, this is a safety officer.

I do more than that, but I now feel very important indeed.
I was once called an Inspector!
It is essential to look important.

Why? To compensate for your inadequacies?