"Bill Daniels" bildan@comcast-dot-net wrote in message
...
Way back, I got a chance to play with some prototype "ATV - like" consumer
ground effect machines. They looked like a cross between a Vespa motor
scooter and an ice rink resurfacing machine. We unloaded them in a big,
empty parking lot and fired them up.

The first thing you learn about ground effect machines is that they stir
up
a LOT of dust - even where you didn't expect there would be any dust.

The second thing is that they will almost uncontrollably slide downhill.
In
this case, until they got to the storm drain gratings in the corner of
the
parking lot where they grounded themselves - there's no ground effect
above
a grating. We then faced the problem of an 800 pound machine with no
wheels
firmly stuck on a storm drain grate. Fortunately, the truck that
delivered
them had a wrecker crane - possibly due to the developers previous
experiences with storm drain grates.

We decided that dry land was possibly not their native environment so we
tried them over water since water is 'mostly' level.

The first thing you learn about ground effect machines over water is that
they kick up a LOT of spray - enough to thoroughly soak the driver. You
need goggles to keep the spray out of your eyes but spray covered goggles
are hard to see through.

The second thing you eventually discover is that when the engine quits
over
water the thing sinks FAST. Fortunately, the developer had a water
recovery
skiff with a crane and plenty of drying out stuff - possibly due to
previous
experiences with over water engine failures.

Maybe this is why you don't see a lot of consumer ground effect ATV's.

Bill Daniels

That was great. I was read for a couple of really good laughs.

Peter