Honor Blackman - blackman01.jpg (1/1)

"Alan Erskine" rudely blurted out
:

"Mitchell Holman" wrote in message
...
Rare to see that much hostility in this group, true enough.

What gives?

With Hemi? He's been on other binaries groups, including the one I
named, and caused problems there. It's all that guy seems to do and I'm
sick and tired of all the rubbish that has been going on in _this_ group
for the past couple of months. This is a great group, but there have
been several newer people come in and damage the 'feel'.

I'm sick and tired of people like Hemi, 'Lee' (regardless of how he
spells it to get around kill files), J3 and others have treated this
forum and the other people in it.




After nearly a month of just lurking and putting up with
your crap, Einstein, YOU YOURSELF ARE TO BLAME for my delurking!

You want to take this outside the newsgroup, Einstein?

All you are is a non-posting, trolling, low IQ, self-absorbed,
navel-gazing, usenet LIAR!

I'll be sure and let everyone know in advance, why I
nymshift every day - make your miserable, officious-assed
life miserable.

Have you followed through with you threats to report me
to newsguy for "forging" my headers?

Does my header have your blessing now? Read carefully!

You have only to apologize to me, laddie and the entire
group for being LIAR. Then I might let this rest.

Don't forget. I maintain *all* the earlier posts if you
choose to berate me or deny your lying.

If you choose taking this outside, you must first
pull **YOUR HEAD** out.

OH, BTW... I'll do this for you. Here is a copy of
the flamers bible. You might wish to pay particular
attention to #1, #8, #11, #12 -then look at my sig.

The FLAMERS BIBLE


The twelve commandments of flaming

1. Make things up about your opponent: It's important to make your
lies sound true. Preface your argument with the word "clearly."
"Clearly, Fred Flooney is a liar, and a dirtball to boot."

2. Be an armchair psychologist: You're a smart person. You've
heard of Freud. You took a psychology course in college.
Clearly, you're qualified to psychoanalyze your opponent. "Polly
Purebread, by using the word 'zucchini' in her posting, shows she
has a bad case of penis envy."

3. Cross-post your flames: Everyone on the net is just waiting for
the next literary masterpiece to leave your terminal. From
rec.arts.wobegon to alt.gourmand, they're all holding their
breaths until your next flame. Therefore, post everywhere.

4. Conspiracies abound: If everyone's against you, the reason can't
*possibly* be that you're a ****head. There's obviously a
conspiracy against you, and you will be doing the entire net a
favor by exposing it.

5. Lawsuit threats: This is the reverse of Rule #4 (sort of like
the Yin & Yang of flaming). Threatening a lawsuit is always
considered to be in good form. "By saying that I've posted to
the wrong group, Bertha has libeled me, slandered me, and
sodomized me. See you in court, Bertha."

6. Force them to document their claims: Even if Harry Hoinkus
states outright that he likes tomato sauce on his pasta, you
should demand documentation. If Newsweek hasn't written an
article on Harry's pasta preferences, then Harry's obviously
lying.

7. Use foreign phrases: French is good, but Latin is the lingua
franca of flaming. You should use the words "ad hominem" at
least three times per article. Other favorite Latin phrases are
"ad nauseum," "vini, vidi, vici," and "fetuccini alfredo."

8. Tell 'em how smart you a Why use intelligent arguments to
convince them you're smart when all you have to do is tell them?
State that you're a member of Mensa or Mega or Dorks of America.
Tell them the scores you received on every exam since high
school. "I got an 800 on my SATs, LSATs, GREs, MCATs, and I can
also spell the word 'premeiotic' ."

9. Accuse your opponent of censorship. It is your right as an
American citizen to post whatever the hell you want to the net
(as guaranteed by the 37th Amendment, I think). Anyone who tries
to limit your cross-posting or move a flame war to email is
either a communist, a fascist, or both.

10. Doubt their existence: You've never actually seen your opponent,
have you? And since you're the center of the universe, you
should have seen them by now, shouldn't you? Therefore, THEY
DON'T EXIST! This is the beauty of flamers' logic.

11. Lie, cheat, steal, leave the toilet seat up.

12. When in doubt, insult: If you forget the other 11 rules,
remember this one. At some point during your wonderful career as
a flamer you will undoubtedly end up in a flame war with someone
who is better than you. This person will expose your lies, tear
apart your arguments, make you look generally like a bozo. At
this point, there's only one thing to do: insult the dirtbag!!!
"Oh yeah? Well, your mother does strange things with
vegetables."

The Golden Rule of Flaming

My flames will be witty, insulting, interesting, funny, caustic, or
sarcastic, but never, ever, will they be boring.

---------------------
Here's *my* funny sig from an ABPA thread on 08/16/08:
Alan Erskine says... "I've got an IQ of 151"
"I'm in the 99th percentile for my age group - that's the top 1 percent"
(nice math there, Einstein!) "I doubt very strongly that you know
anyone in my range of IQ" (Thankfully, NO!)
Lee discussing newsserver retention:
"...I can go back about 6 months..."
Alan Erskine interrupts with:
"Why should we wait for six months to download an image
that was posted yesterday?"